The flight is booked, the visa is approved, the job is real. Then, a few weeks after landing, many international nurses find themselves sitting alone in a rented room after a night shift, scrolling through photos from home. Loneliness is one of the most common, and least discussed, parts of nurse migration. It doesn’t mean you made the wrong decision. It means you’re human, and you need people.
Social connection isn’t a luxury. WHO has described loneliness and social isolation as a pressing global health threat, linked to poorer physical and mental health. Building a support network is as important to your success abroad as passing your exams.
Why nurses abroad are vulnerable to loneliness
- Shift work: you’re awake when others sleep and working when they socialise.
- Losing your village: family, church, school friends and neighbours are suddenly thousands of kilometres away.
- Culture shock: different humour, food, weather and social rules.
- Pressure to succeed: many feel they must look happy online because family back home depend on them.
- Time zones make calling home hard.
- Discrimination or feeling like an outsider at work.
Start with work, carefully
- Say yes to the occasional coffee, ward social, or team leaving do, even when tired.
- Eat your break with colleagues rather than alone when you can.
- Look for fellow international recruits who arrived around the same time; they are going through the same adjustment.
- Ask about staff networks: many hospitals have international nurse, Black, Asian or faith staff networks.
- Find a mentor or “buddy”, formally or informally.
Find your communities outside work
- Faith communities: churches, mosques and temples are often the fastest route to belonging, practical help and friendship. Many run services and groups at different times that suit shift workers.
- Diaspora associations: Nigerian, Ghanaian, Kenyan, Filipino, Indian, Zimbabwean and other community groups, and nurses’ associations from your home country with branches abroad.
- Hobbies: a gym, a running club, a choir, a dance class, a football team, a book club. Repeated contact with the same people is how friendships form.
- Volunteering: a great way to meet locals and feel useful beyond the ward.
- Learning: a short course, a language class (especially in non-English-speaking countries like Germany or the Gulf).
Friendship takes time and repetition
Research on friendship suggests it takes many hours of shared time to move from acquaintance to close friend. Don’t be discouraged if the first months feel shallow. Keep showing up. Invite someone for food, offer to swap a shift, check on a colleague who seems low. Small, repeated kindnesses build real bonds.
Stay connected to home without living there
- Schedule regular calls with family and close friends rather than waiting for free time.
- Use voice notes when time zones don’t match.
- But balance it: if all your social energy goes to home, you may never build a life where you are.
Make your home feel like home
Cook food from home, find the shops that sell your ingredients, put up photos, play your music. Comfort and familiarity help your nervous system settle.
Be wary of who you lean on
Loneliness makes people vulnerable to those who exploit it: romance scammers, people pushing risky “investment” schemes, or controlling relationships. See our guides on romance scams and healthy love vs red flags.
When loneliness becomes depression
If you notice persistent low mood, loss of interest, poor sleep beyond shift effects, changes in appetite, hopelessness, or thoughts of self-harm, please seek help. Your GP or family doctor, your employer’s occupational health service or employee assistance programme, and helplines in your country can help. Asking for support is a sign of strength, not failure.
Be the welcome you wish you’d had
Once you’re settled, reach out to the next group of new arrivals. Show them the shops, the bus routes, the church, the best takeaway. Some of the strongest friendships among international nurses start this way.
More on love and relationships: Dating as a nurse · Long-distance love after japa · Nurse burnout