Bullying in Nursing: 12 Signs, What to Say in the Moment and How to Report It

Most nurses have heard the phrase “nurses eat their young”. It is usually said with a shrug, as if being belittled by senior colleagues is simply part of learning the job. It is not. Bullying drives nurses out of the profession, damages their mental health and, because frightened staff are less likely to speak up, puts patients at risk.

This guide explains how to recognise bullying, how it differs from firm feedback, what to say in the moment and how to build a case that your employer has to act on. It applies whether you work in a hospital, a care home or the community, and in any country.

Bullying or just tough feedback?

Not every unpleasant interaction is bullying. A senior nurse who tells you clearly that your drug chart was incomplete, and shows you how to fix it, is doing their job. Bullying has three features that set it apart:

• It is repeated. One bad day is not a pattern. A behaviour that keeps happening is.
• It targets the person, not the task. “You’re useless” rather than “this needs redoing”.
• It involves a misuse of power, whether that comes from rank, experience, popularity or being part of the in-group on the ward.

12 signs you are being bullied at work

1. You are criticised in front of patients, relatives or colleagues instead of in private.
2. You are given the heaviest or most complex patients again and again, with no support.
3. Information you need is “forgotten” at handover, so you look incompetent later.
4. Your requests for help are ignored while others are helped straight away.
5. You are left off the rota for training, good shifts or study days without explanation.
6. Colleagues go quiet when you walk in, or you are excluded from breaks and group chats.
7. Your mistakes are broadcast; your good work is never mentioned.
8. You are mocked for your accent, qualifications, age, faith or where you trained.
9. Deadlines or standards are set for you that nobody else is held to.
10. You are threatened, openly or subtly, with complaints, bad references or losing your job.
11. You dread specific shifts because of who is on.
12. You start doubting skills you were confident in a few months ago.

Internationally educated nurses are often especially exposed. Being new to a country, a health system and sometimes a language makes it easier for others to undermine you, and harder for you to know what is normal. If you recognise several of these signs, trust your judgement.

What to say in the moment

You do not need a perfect comeback. Short, calm, factual phrases work best. They name the behaviour and move the conversation somewhere more professional:

• “I’m happy to talk about this, but not in front of the patient. Can we step into the office?”
• “Can you tell me specifically what you’d like me to do differently?”
• “I didn’t get that information at handover. Can we go through it now so the patient is safe?”
• “I’d like to understand why I’ve been allocated these patients again. Can we look at the allocation together?”
• “Please don’t speak to me like that. I’m listening, and I want to get this right.”

Bringing the conversation back to patient safety is powerful. It is hard for anyone to argue against it, and it shows you are focused on the work.

How to document bullying

If you ever need to make a formal complaint, notes made at the time carry far more weight than memories. Keep a private log, not on a work computer, with:

• The date, time and place
• Exactly what was said or done, in quotation marks where you can
• Who else was present
• How it affected you or your patients (for example, a delayed medication)
• Any emails, messages or rotas that back it up

Use the same factual style you use in clinical documentation: what happened, not how angry you felt.

Where to report it

Every employer should have a dignity at work, anti-bullying or grievance policy. Ask for a copy or find it on the intranet. The usual route is:

1. An informal conversation with your line manager or a manager you trust, if it is safe to do so.
2. A formal written complaint or grievance under the employer’s policy, using your log as evidence.
3. Your union or professional association, which can advise you and attend meetings with you.
4. Speak-up or whistleblowing routes if the bullying affects patient safety. In England, for example, NHS organisations have Freedom to Speak Up Guardians.
5. Occupational health and your healthcare provider if your health is suffering. This also creates a record.

In some countries, serious or discriminatory bullying can also be taken to an employment tribunal, labour court or equality body. Get advice from your union before you go down that route, as time limits often apply.

Looking after yourself

Bullying wears people down slowly. Talk to someone outside the ward: a friend, a mentor or a counsellor through your employer’s assistance programme. Keep doing the things that remind you who you are outside work. If you notice signs of burnout or low mood that do not lift, speak to a healthcare provider.

Sometimes the healthiest decision is to move. Changing wards or employers is not “letting them win”. It is choosing a workplace where you can practise safely.

If you see someone else being bullied

Bystanders change the culture of a ward. You can interrupt (“Let’s finish this in the office”), check on your colleague afterwards, offer to be a witness and report what you saw. New nurses remember who stood up for them.

The International Council of Nurses recognises workplace violence and bullying as a threat to both nurses and patient safety, and calls on employers to have clear policies to prevent and address it.